Well, before we get there and how to cultivate a Confidence Mindset, let me share a story. For my 40th birthday, back in 2018, I had the intention to hike to the peak of Mt Kilimanjaro in Africa. At midnight on Day 5 of the Rongai route, we’d set out for the summit. I knew it was 6k from base camp, yet the altitude would dramatically increase from 4720m (15,485ft) to 5895m (19,340ft). If I made it, this would be the highest peak I’ve ever hiked.

Before I boarded the flight for this trip, I barely told anyone I was going. I was terrified I might not make it. But worst would be the embarrassment of going on this tour only to come back and tell everyone who knew I failed at my attempt or my body couldn’t handle the altitude. And you never really know until you’re faced with it head-on, and it doesn’t matter how fit you are. Altitude can kick your ass.

The truth of the matter, I didn’t feel prepared enough. My training consisted of CrossFit 2x per week, running 1-2x per week (hill training in the hot, humid summer of NY), walking my then puppy daily about 2 miles, and yoga, maybe once a week. I had gotten in only one hike a few weeks before in NJ, with no recent training for higher altitude.

Despite lacking confidence for this challenge, I had enough courage to risk it. Because I wanted to live on the edge of glory, with this climb and everything afterwards. And I was committed, so I trained as best I could as a new doggie mama. I survived trekking the Inca Trail to Machu Picchu, with the highest peak at 4200m (13,770ft), two years before. Besides this, other aligned actions included visiting the travel doctor for altitude sickness pills taken as a preventative because that’s how it works. And gathering and packing all the right technical gear I’d need from the REI store.

We trekked all through the night; it felt never-ending. It was freezing and wickedly windy. Dressed in five layers on top, four layers on the bottom. Even in heavy ski gloves, my hands went numb; temps were around -14C before sunrise and after -10C degrees, approximately 7F to 14F degrees. The terrain changed from loose volcano scree to hands-free boulders to ice and snow.

The challenge was beyond real. Beyond my physical limits. My legs trembled from exhaustion when we paused. I felt my heart and lungs expand to get enough oxygen to survive and carry on. Even on the meds.

Channeled all my mental energy, calling on my mantras, inner warrior, runner’s mindset, and breathing to continue. The words of Gipson, lead GA tour guide, echoed in my mind, “Pain is temporary. Victory lasts forever.” He’d shared in our pep talk back at base camp.

Quitting wasn’t an option for me. Unless it was for my highest good, beyond my control. I kept visualizing myself at the summit and the stories I would share. This climb was a practice connecting to the moment and with my body.

Joyful tears cried when I finally reached Uhuru Peak at 8:50 am, after 8.5 hours of trekking through the night and early morning. I can say I am a warrior who hiked Mt Kilimanjaro. Steady, Safe, Strong.

And since I’ve hiked to Mt Kilimanjaro summit, I feel more confident I can hike to Everest’s base camp. Because it’s at 5364m (17,598ft), which is a lower altitude than the summit of Mt Kilimanjaro. But double the trekking miles. Of course, it will still be a challenge. Let’s not minimize this at all. (Everest summit is for Mountaineers, and that’s not me, at least not today.)

Let’s break it down and give you a simple formula for the Confidence Mindset. This comes from what I learned from my mentors, my experience, and working with my clients.

Courage + Commitment + Aligned Action = Confidence (CCA = C or CCAC)

Confidence is a topic that continues to come up with my coaching clients. Maybe even with most or all of my clients at some point. Because when you’re out of your comfort zone or considering doing something new or different or developing yourself, you may pause, think, and stop yourself.

“I don’t know how to do it.”
“I don’t know if I have what it takes to do it.”
Or maybe even: “What if I mess up while doing it and ruin everything?”

It’s often noted as “Learn how to build more confidence in X” in my client’s goals. Whether it’s focused on inner confidence, communication, setting boundaries, in their work or personal relationships, as a speaker, stronger leadership presence, minimizing the effect of imposter syndrome, motivating and building confidence in their team, or embracing a growth mindset and confidence with the unknown.

Confidence comes from practice. Waiting to feel confident before you do X, Y, or Z? You may be waiting endlessly then. And nothing will change.

You can be Courageous or Brave and still feel nervous or worried or have fears. You can borrow Confidence from what you know to be true for yourself or your strengths or your past similar successful experience. You can even borrow Confidence from someone else who sees your potential until you believe it yourself.

Forget about waiting to feel Confident. Find the Courage and Commitment. Then take the Aligned Action. Trust that Confidence will follow.

Let me support you or your team in finding the courage, commitment, and figuring out the actions, so you all feel more confident and achieve your goals. I can be your coach that helps you flip your mindset, so you stand strong and confident and happier doing or having what you desire.

I can be your “tour guide” for your climb up “Mt Kilimanjaro” and whatever that may represent for you.

Tell me, what’s your “Mt Kilimanjaro” and what’s one step you’re going to take this week to get closer to your summit?

Either hit reply on this email (sarina@crself.com), DM me, or comment on the Instagram post (Mt Kilimanjaro hiking adventure photos!) for motivational and encouraging words.

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I deeply honor you. Thank-you for being part of the C&R Self community! Namaste. – Sarina

Sarina Tomel
Leadership/Mindset Coach + HR/Training Consultant
Speaker ~ Writer ~ AdventureSeeker

Sarina is working on a memoir about recovery through running, repeated heartbreak, and healing the trauma.

Sarina teaches and coaches her clients on how to Step up, Speak up, and Stand up for their careers, relationships, and well-being. 

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P.S. Here’s the link to book an initial 15-20 min consult with me to figure out if we’re aligned and what’s the best approach to move forward.

P.S.S. Are we connected on Instagram? Come join me and let’s chat there! I love sharing mantras and stories there as well.